Well, thought I'd post an update.

I attempted numerous times to contact the buyer, each time carefully explaining that I needed him to simply log into his Paypal account and change his address to his new address so that it could be "verified."

It seems he simply chose not to respond. Two weeks have now passed, and he filed a case against me as not having received his item. So, as a part of the resolution process, I have AGAIN contacted him, AGAIN requesting that he log into his Paypal account and change his shipping address.

Now we'll see if he responds and how this plays out. I can't help but think I'm being "worked" on here some how; some sort of scam. Since he logged into his eBay account to file the case, he has to have seen my many messages.

BTW, his drum has been packed up and ready-to-ship since Wednesday, August 7...

Well, if you have his money and ebay says to ship to old address then thats what I would do. He cant take his money back can he? You have all of those messages to fall back on and heck, ebay said to ship it to the old address, so do it and be done with it. If he complains and says he never got it you have enough evidence to claim your case.

The problem is that I really don't trust eBay, either. The CS rep told me to ship to the verified address, but since that was a telephone conversation and not in a message, who's to say someone "higher up" in CS would say I shouldn't have done that and their people wouldn't have told me that?

I'm thinking that when this is all said and done, I'm going to end up refunding the buyer's money, which I was tempted to do a week ago anyway.

I have learned a valuable lesson here... from now on, I am going to specifically state in all of my listings that I will ONLY ship to VERIFIED Paypal addresses, and tell prospective buyers that I might cancel transactions if they request otherwise. I now understand why other sellers specifically state that in their listings.

Ya you can pick out the experienced ebay sellers by the way they list all of their rules of payment and shipping. You have to be very very specific when dealing with the general public.

Do you think he is trying to receive the drum at the old address then after he gets it, change the address on his paypal, then file a complaint that he never got the drum, and then ebay forces you to refund the money.

OK, I see your concern and now what if you refund him, keep the drum? What can he do, file a complaint because you gave him his money back? Would that damage your rating?

Yes, IF I refund his money, that drum is staying right where it is! And, IF he is allowed to ding my feedback over this, I actually feel sorry for the eBay CS rep who answers my call, because I will FIGHT the negative feedback!

As I've stated before, I live in such a "rural" area that I NEED eBay to keep things going. My "local" business is almost non-existent. And although I do appreciate the business this site generates, it's nowhere near as consistent as sales on eBay and is minuscule in comparison. Now, if I had the time to travel (like a salesman) from town to town and school to school (had this thought this last weekend on my "drum run")... well, I'm just not in a position to quit my job and step out and try that... yet.

All I needed to see what Bill saying he felt like he was being snookered. Game over. Send him his money and move on with selling it again.

The guy is moving so he decides to bid on a drum knowing the shipping address will be all messed up for awhile??? No offense Bill, but this isn't a tophat and cane or autograph of the stars drum we are talking about here. It is a pretty common drum that the buyer could wait until he was settled to buy, easily.

Send him his money and turn the page on the mess is my thoughts!

+1..Time to close the door on this buyer.The more time I spend online,the more I become convinced,that there's quite a few people out there,whos elevator dosen't go to the top floor,and are at best,a sandwhich short of a picnic.

Don't let this mellon head wear you down Bill,send him his money,and be done with this headache.You'll sell the drum,and maybe for more money this time.

Steve B