Q. How do you get a drummer to stop biting his nails?

A. Make him wear shoes!

Q: How do you get a drummer to stop playing?

A: Put sheet music in front of him

How do you know a drummer is knocking at your door?

(choose one)

1. The knocking speeds up.

2. The knocking slows down.

3. He doesn't know when to come in.

4. You see the pizza delivery vehicle outside.

5. You hear accents in his knocking pattern.

How Many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five, one to actually do it and 4 others to talk about how much better Buddy, Ringo, Bonham, Peart, etc would have done it.....

How do you get the drummer off your front porch?

Pay him for the pizza....

And.. a drummer without a stripper/girl friend is..........

Homeless.....

Don't forget to tip your wait staff...

what's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?

you only have to punch the information into the machine once.

What did the drummer say when the gig was over? ............. "Let's beat it!"

Drummers - violently bashing heads with wooden sticks

Guitarists - rubbing strings with calloused fingers

Keyboardists - tickling the ivory

Are you serious? There are drummer jokes? Hard to believe any of the originators survived to tell 'em.

What do Ginger Baker and canteen coffee have in common?

They both suck without Cream.

John

Why do drummers go to school?

to learn how to clean the halls.....

I hoped he'd post by now... I'd still like to know which drummer joke broke the camel's back and soured our fellow drummer, 'tiredofdrummerjokes' on the whole genre. :confused:

It must be a pip!

John